The Great Wall of the TTB

Back on March 10th, we posted about our TTB wall plans. The goal was to separate our tasting area from our brewing area.

Needless to say, we were a little disappointed we had to separate the two. We had envisioned a more open brewery. However, we soon came to realize the added benefits of the TTB wall. We had counter space where people can rest their tasting glass, the brewery would be separated so we could work in peace and, most importantly, it would keep the brewery and beer safe during the Zombie Apocalypse.

Yep, scientists confirmed earlier this year that zombies are indeed attracted to beer. And the building of this wall greatly increased our brewery zombie defense capability.

So to begin, we went to Home Depot and bought their zombie treated wood. Similar to pressure treated wood, it repels zombies instead of water. We built the frame with this.

building ttb wall frame

Next up we secured the frame to the cement floor with zombie proof bolts. These are rated up to 10 wall pushing zombies each.

securing wall frame with zombie proof bolts

Then we used some zombie proof drywall to cover the frame. We’re not yet sure what makes the drywall zombie proof – we figure it’s one of those things we’ll know when it happens.

zombie resistant drywall

Lastly, we spackled up the wall to make it smooth. It wasn’t zombie rated spackle, but it worked.

spackling the wall

And with that, it was ready for a test zombie.

zombie tested brewer approved

ZOMBIES! ZOMBIES!

It worked. The main part of the TTB wall was zombie tested, brewer approved.

first part ttb wall complete

Next up we had to create the sliding wall portion of the zombie defense system. The primary function of this door is to prevent zombies from entering the brew deck. Secondarily, it needed to look awesome.

To do this we had to secure wooden rails to the side of the walk in cooler that could withstand the shear force of a zombie attack, and hold the sliding wood door.

sliding ttb wall

After the rails were installed, all that was left was to paint the zombie door and add a locking mechanism. We originally were going to spring for a biometric combination lock for added protection. However, after watching a few zombie movies to study their tactics, we realized that zombies have issues opening unlocked doors. So we opted for a simple locking mechanism instead.

Oh, and we also added caution tape and a “Restricted Area” sign just in case zombies learned basic cautionary patterns and how to read.

restricted area ttb wall

And now the brewery is zombie proof. Oh, and I suppose, we’re also TTB compliant.

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One Response to “The Great Wall of the TTB”

  1. Sanj Surati says:

    Very cool!

    Here’s a video of zombies actually brewing beer:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wA2fyMmn1O0

    Sanj

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